Wednesday, December 8, 2010

My thoughts, though they will be unread, on "Bridal Plasty"

Please pardon me before I start writing I need to vomit, because now I really know I'm not thin enough, pretty enough or perfect enough to walk on this earth. I hear now in order to publish blogs online you need to weigh no more than 120lbs...even thats pushing it..fatty. You must be at least 5'11'' in heels, big beach ball boobies and have a perfect symmetrical face with high cheek bones, fat swollen vagina lips, a creepy michael nose and crazy brows!

Yes of course the perfect woman, we all desire to be that...unless you are a man then I don't judge you for wanting to be the perfect woman. But for real? This shows premise is a bunch of brides to be are fighting for a chance to go under the knife and become the perfect bride, what ever that is. Every week there is a competition and the girl that wins gets a surgery, messed up. Some girls are chubby, some have big noses, boobs they don't like, scars(I can understand that surgery) and all just want to be perfect for when they walk down the aisle. Heres a question though...what if your fiance doesn't think you're perfect? I am looking at this as a "they all got engaged because they were deeply in love and this is their soulmate" point of view, but, when your boyfriend made the step to ask you his hand in marriage and all the times you've kissed, and (if you are the sex before marriage type) when you make love and he see's you in your most natural and beautiful way, naked, doesn't he think you're perfect then? and if not he's a total douche and you shouldn't be with him if he thinks you need to change your appearance! I just think that a natural unlifted, unnipped, untucked and all of you body and face is the best version of yourself.

Yeah I know, I am not happy with my body, or face but I know Tim looks at me and feels like he's the luckiest guy alive. I wouldn't mind a little smart lipo help around my midsection but I'm broke as shit and go to the gym instead because I'm not a selfish bitch. When I got married I didn't give a flying crap about what I looked like for Tim...yeah I know that sounds awful but think about it this way...If this man is the man you are spending the rest of your life with and if you know him to any degree of intimacy and friendship then I would think he has:
a. held your hair while you puked because you got food poisoning
b. heard you fart, or burp and you're not afraid to in front of him
c. has seen making the ugliest crying faces because everyone is when then cry
d. enough love for you that it doesn't matter if you're wearing a burlap sack, chances are he's getting laid tonight...oh and you are now his wife....of course:0)

I'm sorry for this silly rant but it just really saddens me to think that our society in so vain and in need of the perfect everything, the man with the right paycheck, the nice car and home, that we've lost touch in what the sanctity of marriage is all Can't two crazy assholes just fall in love and get hitched for no other reason but that? I did and don't judge me unless you want a visit from stan and larry, my body guards....want to meet them?




1 comment:

  1. I love you. I'm alittle more afraid of larry. <3 ktk